Lessons

Everyone comes into our lives for a reason. Either a blessing, or a lesson. You were a blessing at first, but I was a fool, you became a lesson. First of all, fuck my feelings. Feelings are so unnecessary, but at the same time, without feelings, we won't know how to love and appreciate. You know what is the most heartbreaking thing? I thought the feelings were small, but you managed to hold it tight in your hands, playing it all around, and one fine day, you toss it on the ground and left without looking back. From the strongest person I was, I became the most vulnerable piece of shit crying tears for someone who will not give a fuck.

Why is it so hard to not fall in love? Why is it so easily to fall out of love? Feelings. Fuck them hard, my feelings grow fast, fade faster. Since day one, I have been asking you the same question again and again. You denied it, you fucking denied it. You're selfish, and all you think about is to seek attention and pleasure from other's weaknesses. You're more than an asshole. Don't blame me for saying all these, because you don't give a fuck after all. You were misleading. I had my precautions, but you led me on. I was stupid, to even make friends with a person like you. Acting all emotional, acting all depressed, you're just another attention-seeking hoe.

No one could understand you, and it seemed like only I did. I thought I did too, but I think you don't even understand what humans are made of. Feelings, we all have fucking feelings, not just you. When you assume you are able to help someone, to be fair to someone and to not hurt someone merely by ignoring them, you're wrong at all levels. The more you care about someone, the more you should be sharing with them, tell them what you really feel. You had no balls, well obviously, I don't blame you for that. You had zero guts to open up to me, plus you were laughing away. Correct me if I'm wrong, but you're a loser.

You made things sounded like, you're all innocent and helpless. You always claim that it is your fault. Wake the fuck up man, it has nothing to do w faults. You think that blaming yourself in front of me can make you less guilty? You're so pathetically pitiful, If you think that hiding the truth is the solution to not hurting other people, you're brainless.  After revealing the truth and I did not react to the way you planned, you started blaming yourself for even telling me. What the fuck. You are so fucking selfish. You keep everything to yourself, thinking that people won't get hurt, and act like you're so fucking emotionally injured. What hurts most is faking in front of each other. It's like wasting everyone's time. Just be true to yourself. Its such a shame, that you cannot even do things truthfully for yourself. Your feelings say A, your actions do B.

What breaks me the most is after a month of unknown silence, you come back telling me oh I just wanted to be fair to you, not to hurt you that's why I kept distance from you. Yeah, I totally understand, maybe you were having fun playing with my feelings, that's why you didn't bother. You're wrong, you're insane, you're psycho, you're ignorant. You are no fucking one to play with anyone's feelings like this.

I hope I can be a lesson in your life. When you play with fire, you will burn yourself. I am aware that I am no loss to your life, Without me you will still be the fake-smiling loud-speaking attention-seeking little hoe. Continue being you, I am moving on :)